There are 260 entries in Rants
FEATURED RANTS
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Charles Bronson, R.I.P.
Read more: Charles Bronson, R.I.P.What about his biography? His childhood or family life? Frankly, I don’t give a shit, nor should anyone else who claims to love film.
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My Addiction Conniption
Read more: My Addiction ConniptionSo… I have a lot of excess baggage, and a lot of past pain I need to shed. For nine years, I was a really bad drug addict/junkie, or as I preferred to be called a narcotics enthusiast. I used to refer to myself as a garbage pail. See, that was a term I used…
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An Angry Rant About Something
Read more: An Angry Rant About Something“The modern audience” They did it again, they ruined something I loved, and the poor executives had no choice but to do it, such is their power, such is their reach. [scratchy audio] Mr. Cobb: Is that them…them, coming out of Applebee’s, it looks like them[inaudible] What do you mean “how are they supposed to…
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Road Trains: A Meaningless Rant About Truckles
Read more: Road Trains: A Meaningless Rant About TrucklesThe Instant Death & Disaster Show! Just imagine, if you will, the great Australian outback: mile after endless mile of absolutely nothing but dry red sands, and the occasional kangaroo. It’s hot. And empty. And vast. Through it cuts one, immeasurable ribbon of tarmac, leading from point A to nowhere, forever and ever. On it,…
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Violent Thoughts About A Film-maker
Read more: Violent Thoughts About A Film-makerViolent thoughts about a filmmaker are rare, and should be, unless that filmmaker is Rian Johnson. Why? What thoughts should you have if the dilettante manor-borne son of the elite without a tenth of the talent required to actually claim a chair amongst that elite were to take power and, say, set torch to everything…
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Spinning Plates: Part 4
Read more: Spinning Plates: Part 4Prince in Purple Rain (1984) I like some Prince songs such as Thieves in the Temple, Sign o’ the Times and a fair chunk of the mega-selling Purple Rain stuff. He had something, all right, but too often I find his music tinny and unconvincing. I also got embarrassed by the guy’s self-indulgent sulking, like…
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Spinning Plates: Part 3
Read more: Spinning Plates: Part 3Olivia Newton-John in Grease (1978) “Got any porno?” Debbie Harry asks in Videodrome. “Gets me in the mood.” Good line, but I doubt Newton-John ever said anything like it during her movie career. She might’ve been known as Olivia Neutron-Bomb after the release of the image-altering, multi-million selling Physical, but in reality, has any late…
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Spinning Plates: Part 2
Read more: Spinning Plates: Part 2Jagger in Performance (1970) & Ned Kelly (1970) Art and commerce have a weird relationship. On the face of it, it makes perfect sense to slap a pop star into a feature film, sit back and watch his or her fans gobble up the tickets. Who needs marketing when you’ve got a built-in audience? Such…
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Spinning Plates: Part One
Read more: Spinning Plates: Part OneFrom Bing Crosby’s silky crooning in The Road to Singapore to Mark Wahlberg’s seven-inch, floppy rubber cock in Boogie Nights, it’s clear that the musical stars of the day have always fancied their big screen chances. Perhaps after topping the charts it’s the most natural of moves. Then again, maybe such success merely prompts their…
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Top 10 Christmas Movie Characters Top 10 Ruthless Reviews Comedies Top 10 Reasons To Be An Atheist Top 10 Movie Drunks Top 10 Favorite Christmas Movies Top 10 Most Outrageous YouTube EatingRANTS LIST
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Manchester By The Sea and political correctness
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Is Stephen King good or Isn’t He?
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Why This Year’s Oscar Movies Suck
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A Look At The Extreme Lengths People Will Go To Watch A Film
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Bob Dylan’s Nobel Prize Is Boomers’ Latest Attempt To Cram The Entire World Up Their Asses
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America’s Next Top Nazi
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The Race And Class Election Puzzle, Solved By A Guy Who Loves Seagal Movies.
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Why I’m A Free Speech Absolutist
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7 True Crimes That Deserve To Be Ripped From The Headlines
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Why Humanity Deserves A Moon Vault
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Captain America: A Blockbuster for Blockheads
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Noah: A Rant
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L. Ron Mexico’s Three Health Tips to Avoid and Three Health Tips to Enjoy
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God’s Not Dead: Christian Movie Trailer
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The Door’s Ray Manzarek: Eulogy for an Organ Player
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The Duggars: 18 And counting no more
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Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
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Ringers: Lord of the Fans (2005)
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The Freak Kingdom Answers His Critics
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Onward Christian Psychos