Comfortable and Furious

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“Barbie has a great day every day, but Ken only has a great day if Barbie looks at him.”


  • Batman Ninja (2018)

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    Batman Ninja (2018) Right. Even with the lowest of expectations, this film could not possibly appeal to even the most masturbation-induced brain damaged victims of whatever DC anime cult still exists. This attempt at a movie was so childish and horribly written and displayed that I don’t know who else it could possibly appeal to.…

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  • Children of Men (2006)

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    Children of Men (2006) Cuaron’s Children of Men is one of the few post-apocalyptic nightmares I can believe in. Its dystopian vision of a future world not so far away (its events are set in 2027) rings true from start to finish, and its unrelenting bleakness never reeks of hyperbolic fantasy. This is not a…

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  • Rampage

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    Keep it simple, stupid. If you were to make a list of video games you would most like to see adapted into movies, I am guessing that list would include exactly zero classic arcade games. I have never expressed a desire to see a Galaga or Centipede movie on the silver screen nor have I…

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  • A Quiet Place

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    A Quiet Place I just reviewed another horror movie, Winchester earlier this week. It was dreadful. This week’s movie was a horror/thriller orchestrated by John Krasinski, who also played a lead role alongside his real-world wife Emily Blunt. Like I stated in another review, horror is not my movie genre of choice. If Get Out…

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  • The Ritual (2017)

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    The Ritual (2017) I only get to watch horror movies by myself. This isn’t out of choice. It’s just that my girlfriend wants nothing to do with anything more terrifying than The Emperor’s New Groove. And in this day and age, you can’t casually phone a pal and ask them round to watch a horror…

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  • Winchester (2018)

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    Winchester (2018) is a movie that was based on the true story of the heiress to the enormous fortune of the Winchester Rifle Company. The great Helen Mirren plays Sarah Winchester who lived in an ever-expanding creepy mansion that she was convinced was haunted by the ghosts of the humans retired by her dead husband’s…

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  • Ready Player One

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    Whew! If you are not a fan of CGI and think that CGI is ruining film, Ready Player One might kill you. At the very least, it will give you an aneurism or a stroke. Possibly both. If so, you deserve it. I am not quite ready to devote my year-end review to all of…

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  • Dear Dictator

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    Tatiania Mills (Odeya Rush) will dislodge and eat ABC (Already Been Chewed) gum from beneath the water fountain to taunt and gross out her adversaries at school. Sir Michael Caine again does the equivalent to his career by starring in this mindless atrocity. Michael Caine plays a deposed British Caribbean Republic dictator who comes the…

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  • Sherlock Gnomes

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    O.K. I used to be wracked with guilt as I refused to watch or review animation and most comic book or superhero movies. I felt really bad since I browbeat Al (who no longer speaks to me) into actually spending his own money to watch and review The Emoji Movie. Since then, I have tried…

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  • Pacific Rim: Uprising

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    I’ve seen worse. Coming out of Pacific Rim: Uprising, there were plenty of moviegoers that enjoyed the film and that is cool. There is plenty of room in our lives for big, loud, popcorn flicks like Pacific Rim: Uprising. I, myself, enjoyed the hell out of Pacific Rim and gave it a gigantic pass on…

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