I’m just going to say this up front. Will Ferrell is not funny.

Zoolander, you’re serious? If they spent more than twelve dollars total on this film they got ripped off.

The funniest thing I heard about this movie was that Will Smith blamed Michael Mann for it’s commercial failure, which would be kind of like Dan Quayle blaming Pappa Bush for their loss to Clinton/Gore.

There are three things in this life that I can recommend without the slightest bit of hesitation: finding a job that requires minimal effort, finding a spouse that can engage in spirited conversation, and, perhaps above all, watching The Godfather Part II on the big screen as it was intended.

Wow! I mean, fuck me and wow! Spider-Man is an amazing movie.

I want to die.

Steve McQueen stars as Doc McCoy, a con who just can’t take being locked up anymore, especially after the parole board rejects him.

Jonny is starting to dislike history… If nothing else, The Alamo falsifies the theory that Dennis Quaid will only appear in movies with “good” scripts. Man, was this movie bad. I guess I need to get into the tediousness, the mendacity, how belabored the whole project was, but what I find stupefying is that supposedly…

A truly original motion picture is, like a deep-thinking conservative, a rare find in the world today. Given the sheer, deafening volume of clichéd-ridden garbage that seems to flow endlessly from the sewers of Hollywood, it seems almost impossible that a work of daring and mad brilliance could ever be produced in any corner of…