Category: Movies
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Dumb Money
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Read more: Dumb Money“Dumb Money” – Cha-ching! People love to fantasize about striking it rich in various ways. Winning the lottery, nailing the parlay at the track, becoming a YouTube star, or inheriting a fortune from cranky old Aunt Ethyl after she falls into a pile of fur coats and suffocates to death. What’s that? Aunt Ethyl is…
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Leon: The Professional
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Read more: Leon: The ProfessionalI was going through my DVD collection, trying to find some really top-tier movie that my friend had not seen, and we came upon Leon: The Professional, a great choice. It is really hard to go wrong with one of the best movies ever filmed. To say that this masterpiece is criminally underrated and underappreciated…
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My Big Fat Greek Wedding #3
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Read more: My Big Fat Greek Wedding #3Everyone has that relative who loves nothing more than to set up a slide show for two hours of show-and-tell about their recent trip to Baton Rouge. My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 was a lot like that slide show… [TV suddenly shuts off the football game mid-third-quarter] Aunt Nia: [Sets down remote control] Ok…
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The Onion Field
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Read more: The Onion FieldThere is a certain sensibility to many 1970s Hollywood dramas, a style that has been imitated but rarely truly achieved in any subsequent era, a nihilistic feeling of doom and hopelessness that pervades at least until the sunshine beam of hope cracks through the darkness in the final scene (or not). It’s a blessing that…
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Striking Distance
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Read more: Striking DistanceTagline: They shouldn’t have put him in the water, if they didn’t want him to make waves. Entire Story in Fewer Words Than Are in This Sentence: All Cops Are Bastards, Except Willis. Homoeroticism: Much like “Dirty” Harry Callahan before him, and unlike the homoerotic heroes we know and love from classics like Commando or…
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Grand Turismo
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Read more: Grand Turismo“Gran Turismo” – Nerds…in…raaAaAAaaaAaaace. Every video gamer dreams of playing video games as a career profession. I once seriously considered applying for a job as a video game tester that listed among its requirements a “deep knowledge of baseball.” My childhood dream was to become a professional baseball player and a job playing a baseball…
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Moms’ Night Out
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Read more: Moms’ Night OutThe Unbearable Whiteness of White People.
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The Last Voyage Of The Demeter
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Read more: The Last Voyage Of The Demeter“The Last Voyage of the Demeter” – Batman begins. The following is a series of entries from a critic’s log. 9 Aug, 7:15 pm – While searching for my seat, I am surrounded by groups of people dressed as if it is Halloween. They are not dressed in the cheap outfits found at certain Halloween…
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Haunted Mansion
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Read more: Haunted Mansion“Haunted Mansion” – Disney Scary. The Haunted Mansion ride at Disneyland was my favorite ride when I was a kid. I loved it so much that I would listen to my 78-rpm story-book record over and over until I fell asleep at night. And don’t think that I’ve grown out of it. I own Haunted…
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Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning
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Read more: Universal Soldier: Day of ReckoningVan Damme looks suitably tormented and wearied by age, but, really, can a serious science fiction plot coexist in a movie promising bone crunchings galore and Lundgrenades of ridiculousness?