Category: Features
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The Neon Demon
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Read more: The Neon DemonComing from the position of not knowing his earlier output, this take might be limited but better to have tried and failed, right? Nicolas Winding Refn occupies a unique place among active filmmakers, but also a precarious one. Revered without being critic-proof, his films decidedly garner polarizing sentiment. As a whole his later filmography forms…
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Christopher Robin
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Read more: Christopher RobinRufio-o-o-o-o! If I saw a kid carrying a bunch of stuffed animals and those stuffed animals were talking, I might raise an eyebrow as I walked by. It is 2018 – a talking toy of any sort is commonplace. However, if it were 1948, I might follow the kid home, then find a priest to…
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Mission Impossible Six: Fallout
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Read more: Mission Impossible Six: FalloutMission Impossible Six: Fallout 2 hours 27 minutes, PG-13 for boiling coolant to the face. Fair Value of This Film: $3.00. Some good stunt work, but nothing really sets this film apart from the franchise. As generic as a Honda Accord. I saw this film twenty minutes ago and I’m already starting to forget it.…
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The Equalizer 2
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Read more: The Equalizer 2Discount Batman. After having just watch the MLB All-Star game, my mind was focused on trivial facts. Baseball is full of them. One running joke in my house is whenever my wife overhears a baseball announcer rambling about some statistic, she will add on something like “during day games on a Tuesday in leap years.”…
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Skyscraper
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Read more: SkyscraperIt wasn’t me. It was the one-legged man. “It is good to see the Chinese are embracing the shittiest aspects of American cinema, just like us Americans.” – Me, minutes after the conclusion of Skyscraper. Before you start furiously typing a comment about how Skyscraper is not meant to be an Oscar winner, I know.…
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Fancy Yourself as a Builder of Empires? Try Throne: Kingdom at War
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Read more: Fancy Yourself as a Builder of Empires? Try Throne: Kingdom at WarFreemium MMOs are all the rage right nowbut there are so many out there it can be hard to choose which one to play. The common themes are crafting, gathering resources, building up settlements, and venturing out to conquer other game areas. But, to be truly gripping, the game should have an engaging theme which…
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Ant-Man and the Wasp
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Read more: Ant-Man and the WaspBack to the future. With the box office disappointment of Solo: A Star Wars Story, Disney executives are freaking out. Star Wars has reliably been a billion-dollar-per-movie enterprise since Disney purchased Lucasfilm, and anything less is the equivalent of the New England Patriots failing to win the Super Bowl. In other words, completely unacceptable. Heads…
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Sicario: Day of the Soldado
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Read more: Sicario: Day of the SoldadoWhistling at dogs. Note to readers: I have tried to keep politics out of my movie reviews, but when viewing Sicario: Day of the Soldado, the film’s politics are impossible to ignore given recent events. Thus, it is impossible not to write about politics here. A list of current events in the United States includes:…
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Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
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Read more: Jurassic World: Fallen KingdomJurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is 2 hrs. 8 minutes, PG-13 for maiming and people get used as chew toys Basic Concept: Jurassic Park, except this time we light the dinosaurs on fire. What? There’s a volcano erupting on the Jurassic Park island, and so, you have a lot of stampeding dinosaurs that may also be…
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Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
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Read more: Jurassic World: Fallen KingdomHow to train your dinosaur (or, A steaming pile). “I am never mad at the end of movies. All I wanted from this movie was to be entertained and it could not even do that. And, I liked A Wrinkle in Time. Well, at least until I started thinking about it.” – My friend, after…