Author: J.J. Duquesne

NFL Week 11: Osweiler’s Agent Edition It is 11:08 p.m. on Sunday night. I am soberer than I would prefer, having outdone myself on a steak-and-potato nacho bake that starched up my stomach. This created a temporary but legitimate real estate scarcity, and beer now finds itself the victim of gentrification. At this point the…

Pizza? War? Pizza war? Indeed, the absurdities abound as there is apparently a pizza war in effect now, raging for the soul of the National Football League. The short version goes like this: Self-made Evangelical Christian millionaire and insufferable prick Papa John Schnatter, whose underpaid and uninsured employees make the official pizza of the NFL,…

So there was some killer stuff on the site this week, what with everyone justifiably going bananas over Blade Runner 2049, but did you get a look at Faststeady’s piece on Omaha Hi-Lo? I read it twice despite not being involved in a real competitive poker game against either man or machine since the heyday…

Hey, it happens. Gotta handle the swings, that’s part of the process. Remember, a very famous man of the cloth once said that a mans gotta make at least one bet a day, else he could be walking around lucky and never know it. We’ll be alright. Now, as is custom with most football gambling…

Rats in the cellar! The dreaded double deuce! Dot cinco goose-eggs. The worst of it is that I thought we were rolling early on, too. We nailed the Saints v. Dolphins game in London, even predicting the ugly nature of the whole affair. I didn’t see it obviously, because no one not addicted to cocaine…

NFL Week 3: Best Friends In Love Hey look! Reader mail! Dear J.J.: In reading your prior column, in which you went a very respectable 2-1, I was struck by your assertion that the Kareem Hunts of the world outnumber the Tyreek Hills, perhaps both inside and outside of the game of football. Do you…

NFL Week 2: What Happened? Hillary Clinton Edition Damn you goons! I asked you last week to be decent to one another, at least in terms of how your behavior affects the game we all love. Yet, an hour or so after the column goes up, here comes video of that dumbass Dr. Pepper Guy…

NFL Season Week One: Mother Nature’s Name Is IRMA Edition They say if you love what you do, you will never work a day in your life. Well, truth be told I do love gambling on football and writing about it. I have to level with you though. Making a bunch of jokes after a…