Author: J.J. Duquesne

So get a load of this. Nine days ago as I write this, a close friend of mine had an op ed published by the New York Times. And it’s not even your standard Ross Douthat Bret Stephens garbage, it’s actually really compelling. So how am I to rectify this with our friendship? I sure…

For many years, Antonio Brown’s sole claim to relevancy was limited to being one of the best wide receivers in the world. He grew up in Liberty City, Florida, much like the kids shown on the criminally underrated Friday Night Tykes, became a standout two-sport athlete, and did three years at Central Michigan University, perhaps…

Hey do you see that up there? Right up there, next to my name? See how it says September 5, 2019? You know what that means, don’t you? That’s right gang. It’s That Time of Year! Whoops! How did that get there? I was going for Andy Williams. SweetJesus, one would think it would be…

This will only be my third season of writing at Ruthless. I am hardly an institution around here, not some grizzled veteran beat-writer type. Respectable, yes. Consistent, absolutely. Lust-inducing, sure, I get that all the time. But I’m not part of the furniture, nor some mythical Bob Considine supplemented with a chiseled physique and a…

This is complete bullshit. I am being forced to write this column under protest because the powers that be at Ruthlessco International Unlimited are forcing me to abandon my trusty Chromebook laptop after more than ten years of faithful service! Granted, it was responsible for the occasional inadvertent doublespace, thus mucking up the ASCII characters…

Just kidding. It’s the Hall of Fame Game for Christ’s sake. You can’t – or, to be adamantly clear, you should not under any circumstances – gamble on it. Come on, you knew that already. You know where you are. We don’t suffer fools around here, gladly or otherwise. This is a gambling column. Don’t…

This is it, gang. I hereby cast before you all of the marbles. Every single marble. Even if you don’t play marbles. You’re getting the column relatively early, for me anyway, and you’re getting two picks. I can concede that we won’t get the best lines possible, but I’ve been following all week. Reason being…

SPONSORED CONTENT WARNING: This week’s Ruthless NFL column is brought to you by #HotChicksForRuthlessNFLColumnists, a totally organic and grassroots movement by and for sexy ladies that is not, in any way, a hilariously inept attempt for a doughy, muttering, unshaven, easily distractible lawyer from New York City to cop a side piece over the internet.…

An angrier man would spit out some sort of ALL CAPS excoriation of the goofy ending to the Cowboys-Seahawks game, wherein a freak injury to a 40-year-old professional football player who we had just backhandedly complimented knocked down a domino that tumbled a set of circumstances leading to Seattle being forced to go for two,…

If people are upset with that lady from Michigan calling Trump a motherfucker, they must not get out much, and they damn sure don’t read this publication. I think if anyone should be mad, it would be Dan Savage, who rebranded his old catchphrase DTMFA, an acronym for dump the motherfucker already, into ITMFA, and…