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THE LIGHTER SIDE OF WALL STREET HOLOCAUST

by Erich Shulte

Ah, schadenfreude.  Is there a sweeter word in the English language?  When the financial markets collapse, those of us with little or no short term stake in them can all have a good laugh.  Granted, the people ultimately responsible for it will be laughing even more loudly, driving their rocket cars back to their solid gold houses.  The guys in the middle, who generally have snake handling faith in the "free market," capitalism without restraint and in their own savvy  are the ones who get the rug pulled out.  Unlike those who expect Jesus to come to them as they pass into death, we actually get to see the looks on faces during the jilting of Grant Purchaseall.  



stock picture 10
I considered going into finance at one point and I'd like to think I'd have been this guy.  "You think I put my OWN money into that shit?  Ha!  It's vacation time bitches!"  


stock picture 9
"Hello?  Whole Foods?  I was scoffing at a poster about your job fair last week and I was wondering if you still had any..."

"Don't bother, I already tried them."   


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Maybe, just maybe... It's so crazy it just might...



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No.



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Sometimes I think it would have been fun to go into TV as well, but then I remember that I don't count Klaus Barbie as a soulmate.  


Well, maybe I should, because the total shock in the pics bellow is hilarious to me.  "You mean the stock market has an element of risk?  There's a downside to issuing countless loans to people who don't understand the documents they are signing, often because they don't even speak English?  It actually matters that they could never possibly pay the loans back?"
 stock pictures 2             stock pictures This seems to be the stock exchange's answer to the "duck and cover" method.  

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"But I was ENTITLED!"



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"Maybe if I try to make my mouth the same shape as the graph, I can take control of it."

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If it is possible to overreact to your fortune evaporating, this guy has managed it.



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   This is priceless.  I have nothing to add.
 


Stock Picture 1

"Oh my God!  Things are just as bad on Sesame Street!  You said your fundamentals were strong, Mr. Hooper!"

THE LIGHTER SIDE OF WALL STREET HOLOCAUST Review
by Erich Shulte
Viewed: 10105 Times
Posted: 9.21.08

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USER FEEDBACK


Leeping lawyers
Its sad to think but the ultra modern high tech skyscrapers these fuck bags work in probably have hermetically sealed windows. I was glued to CNN for the first days of this crisis hoping to catch some glimpses of MBA's joining hands and leaping to their long overdue and deserved deaths from their corner office suites. I have citizenship in the EU just a marriage license away so I can just sit back and watch this spoiled, retarded country eat itself to death like the sloth victim in Se7en. HAHAHA
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
Josskacer on 9/21/2008 @ 8:28:25
not over yet
yeah for the time being we're in the shitter but we still outpace every other global economy by a longshot. and josskacer: you think you have it so bad, well no one's forcing you to stay, good riddance asshole.
Rating: 1 out of 5 stars
dingles on 9/22/2008 @ 12:52:18
still_kiwi@mattcalelovesthe cock.org
Good one fuck stain, given that every one in the entire world will be effected in some way by this. If you think this just involves Wall Street brokers, you are even more stupid than you appear, even more stupid than Cale, the stupid fat cunt. Fuck off to Europe then- no one will miss you.
Rating: 1 out of 5 stars
still_kiwi@mattcalelovesthe cock.org on 9/30/2008 @ 2:33:32
Very good for someone with 27 chromosomes
Hey Cale, the hairy asshole eating factory called and told me they were running out of you, you fucking beached whale fat fuck. I really enjoyed the intricacies of your article. Pisshead.
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
Stuart McCracken, Sir on 9/30/2008 @ 6:12:13
HA-HA!
"If it is possible to overreact to your fortune evaporating, this guy has managed it" - It was worth visiting this site for this image alone..
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
Nelson on 11/30/2008 @ 4:41:24
Hey, Eagle-Eye...
While you were busy berating Cale for this article, did you happen to spot that it was written by Shulte?
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
Interested Party on 12/11/2008 @ 10:20:22
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